Friday, May 13, 2016

只越来越不明白爱情。
不管多刻苦铭心。
久了,什么都不是。
只会变成无止尽的枷锁和束缚。
到现在我还是不了解为什么这一切会发生。


我…不好命… 我只是幸运能够拥有金钱来掩饰我的懦弱和痛。

我不喜欢一个人,
不过还是关上心,一个人好了。


做人好烦……真的好烦。

Looking at my banner, makes me miss life from back then when nothing happened... At all. 

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

What is my fashion style?

My fashion style is fat.

Yup.

Fat. Whatever I like and I can wear, I wear. -.-

Being a youtuber is seriously no joke.

I really want a change, but what change can there be?

No. Wait. I need to go do my assignment still.

Fuck la.

#storyofmylife 2016. _|_

Thursday, April 7, 2016

3 months down my new journey.

Hi guys,

Surprised to see me? I am myself.
Life, have been pretty great since I quitted UWA. I got to travel a lot more since then.
Then I decide to start studying again.
It's been three months since I embarked on my new pursuit with the business degree and since then life sucks. Like literally. Sucks.
Tons and tons of assignments, citations, loads of quiz, loads of lectures...
Three months down, I have already messed up with my sleep cycle, but then again, being so sleep deprived so that I can finish my assignments, I can basically sleep everywhere.

That's unless your mom decides to try her best to wake you up for dinner even though you're deep asleep and have been trying to stay asleep for about 30 mins through just because she bought dinner that cannot be eaten tomorrow as breakfast. DAYUMMMMM.

Well, so here I am writing this post. Trying to feel sleepy again.

I have got to learn a lot more outside the box, considering being in the science faculty for this long already. Being in business really pushed me out of the box.
Having so many more outspoken people around me, having people dress up constantly and having to write long paragraphs of work. It's really a culture shock.
Well at least now I got to learn that writing is something that needs constant practice.
I have been writing so much recently that now writing a post seemed like a piece of cake.
But then again, applying back to the uni context, better read more before I get marked down for anymore "forum-like" languages.
For now, feels so good to not have to give two cent of what I am writing. I don't have to care the credibility of what I am writing and I don't have to citate any shit. FUCK THAT SHIT. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
#lifeofanunistudent

Till then.

I am going to do some quiz, writing is instead making me more energetic for no apparent reason.
I am so annoyed now, gonna be so screwed tomorrow. Confirm plus chop.

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

没有人会记得你从前多么的光彩成功。
没有人会理你曾经怎么苦苦的挣扎。
不过,全世界都会记得你放弃过,失败过,跌倒过。

从未跌倒过的你又怎么了解我的痛。

流过多少泪,心累了几回 你又知不知道。

谁不想跌倒了站起来,讲的容易做的难。


Many see a new beginning as a new start, but I can't help it to see it more like a death sentence. 

That feeling alone, is sufficient to show what I'm feeling. 

Just leave me alone since I'm already doing what you want me to do. Stop it with the razor sharp remarks. 
It's not like I don't know how fucked up I'm? I should be the clearest one myself. 
Financial incapable, academic incapable, don't even know what do with my life. Only know how play SIMS 4, stay fat and drama all day long when people around me all graduating, running their own business and earning big bucks. 

I'm not blaming you for anything because I fucked up. Not you, you have your job, your car, your nice figure and your beautiful hair. 





Alright fuck my writing proficiency, fuck everything. 🖕🏻 (I still write like some sec school ah lian.)

I don't even know how to go on with this. Fuck everything, seriously. 

And... I still need to work tomorrow. 
Fuck growing up. 

Sunday, December 28, 2014

A deserved day of break

It has been long since I have logged in to write a post. 
It seemed not long ago when blogging was still a weekly routine I would do to either rant my emotions or simply just to log down things I wouldn't want to forget in my life. 

Now it seemed like I am just wrecking my head just so I can write something proper. 
Maybe it's due to the change of lifestyle, different commitments. Different everything. 
I lost some things, I gained some. I learnt some, I forget some. 

Though some things seemed to never change, those hidden wounds, memories. The pain will always be there. Like how stars would always be there even though you don't always see it. 

At some point of time, I really thought I changed. Be it for the better or for the worst, stronger or weaker, because I know I am changing to what I need to be as of this moment to survive. Yup. You heard right. SURVIVE. So much for grand wishes at the end of the year, every year. 

Now, even surviving seemed such a big word to achieve. 

To a great 2015, I say to myself. 

Till the next break I give to myself, be safe my lil' blog. 

As usual, I don't think  I make any sense, but if there's anyone reading.
Thank you, may the force be with you young one.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

I thought I could.

 What's the use of believing I could when the truth is obviously telling me that I can't. People take uni. I take uni. People work, I work. People pass, I fail. 

I thought I changed for the better, I thought I did, but I got proved wrong. 

I had a good life, now, I just hoped for an ordinary life, a peaceful life. It doesn't have to be fantastic. Just leave the drama out. 

I thought I could handle it.
By caring lesser, by not giving a shit, by not expressing any emotions. 

I thought I could handle it. I really thought I could, but what's the use of staying positive when I'm already on my ends' meet just trying to make everyday work. 

It looks like I'm having a high life full of materialistic wants and shit, but little do they know what I will give all that just to be happy again.

I'm tired of smiling, I'm tired of staying positive. What's the point of staying positive when I die a little inside every time I tell myself "nothing worth it comes easy." What's the point of keeping the faith when there's no longer anything to fight for. 

Those positive quotes on tumblr don't work on me no more. 

I'm tired.

The worst part, I have never felt so alone before. 

Everyone wants a piece of me, about what's going on but just how many truly care because they truly care. 

How many of them who truly cared don't have enough on their plate?

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Food for Thought.

Company recently added a new fish tank near the place I am sitting, as beautiful as it looks with all the tiny little fishes swimming here and there. It is so therapeutic to just stare at it and after hours of hammering the laptop pumping and generating work.
While feeding the fishes and looking at them all eagerly swimming to snatch for food, it suddenly struck me that fishes are also living things, an animal who have their own train of thoughts and feelings just like me and you.

Are we too insensitive to always make an aquarium out of them because they look nice like that?
Putting back into context of humans, I would never be wanted to be placed into somewhere without me knowing, confined into a small area, dealing with people that I am forced to deal with, 24 hours, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Goodness.  At least us humans have a home, to run away from everything. Well, at least for me. 

Count your blessings, people.

Hwaiting, fishies! You are already stronger than I think I would ever be.


I don’t think I make any sense, but I just felt like writing this out. LOL.